" I'll have more poo please "

Hello hello helloooo :)

Ever eaten the poo from kittly litter ? How about munching on some chopped fingers or carefully munching the ear wax from Q-tips ?
Well I did that tonight and let me tell ya, I'm a changed woman ! Oh yes. One bite of cat poo and the universe sang. The chopped fingers tasted just like chicken and the ear wax....apart from bits of it still stuck in my teeth, I am truly speechless. Really, I kid you not.

Supposedly this food is quite rare and only comes out once a year. It's appearance happens on an odd day called 'Halloween' every October 31st., a day and night where humans can dress in strange, freaky, horrific, funny things called costumes and then go around to various abodes ( usually in the evening ) where they yell at the occupants "Trick or Treat !" and then hold out open containers in the form of buckets, bags or pillow cases with the hopes of getting some kind of sweet and/or salty treat tossed in. This can go on for a few hours !

Okay, getting back to the poo and such....

I decided to try my hand at making these 'rare' foods for our son's school lunch -which happens to be on Halloween- and had a jolly good time. The poo isn't really poo sillies ! Hee-hee ! No, it's actually lightly melted and then molded Tootsie Rolls which are then creatively placed on top of ( some slightly immersed ) a cake covered with what looks like cat litter -BUT- our son is not a fan of cake ( except ice cream ) so I made a layer of chocolate pudding followed by butterscotch pudding and then covered with a mix of lightly pulverized oatmeal & pulverized oatmeal cookies. It tastes quite....tasty.
WARNING: when Tootsie Rolls are slightly warmed up and then pulled and reshaped, they re-harden harder than an unwarmed Tootsie Roll. So for those with dentures, you'll need extra Polident ! I don't have dentures but found I had to chew my cat poo a little slower than usual because I don't like the sensation of pulled fillings:

Now how about those chopped fingers ? Did I say they tasted like chicken ? Ha-haaa, nope. They taste like cheese, mozzarella to be exact.
I took mozza cheese strings, casually gave the ends quick rough cuts to make them look more finger-like and then took the middle & gave it a slow twist so when it broke in half the ends would look ragged. I then made nail beds on the rounded finger ends and stuck in half an almond ( you can use whole ones, blanched or slivers too ). A few finger joint creases were made with a knife and then I dipped the chopped ends into hot sauce ( or you could use ketchup, jam, other suaces ). Really easy to make !

Lastly: the ear wax covered Q-tips....yum ! ( imagine John Pinette making his face while saying "Yum !" ). These are a light tasty snack.
I didn't have any toothpicks so I took actual Q-tips and removed the cotton ends, making sure there were no cottony bits remaining on the little white sticks. I then took some mini marshmallows & pushed one on each end of the stick and proceeded to squish the marshies into cotton-looking blobs. The finale was melting an unwrapped caramel -melt until liquidy, about 20 seconds in the micro- and then dipping each Q-tip into the melted caramel creating gobs of rich ear wax. Another simple and fun munchy.

So there you have it. Gross but tasty treats for Halloween, or year round ! Gosh, imagine how your family would react to having kitty litter as a Thanksgiving dessert. How about tossing a few ear wax Q-tips inside a half eaten box of chocolates for your Valentine sweety ? You'll be memorable ;)

Well, bon appetit my friends. Have a safe & fun Halloween boogedy-boogedy-boogedy !